Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
My life is pants optional.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize