If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize