Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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