Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
