Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize