You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
