the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
