i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Randomize