Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Randomize
