like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Randomize
