help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize