How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
