So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Randomize
