i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize
