Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
