He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block