so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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