hell yes lets make some ravioli
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize