Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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