Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
