your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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