Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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