Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
what ever happened to devon sawa?
i'm really worried about him.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
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Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
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answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.