We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
