Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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