I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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