i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Randomize
