U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize