Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
