Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
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He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
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I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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