It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
