Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Randomize
