I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize