in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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