Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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