Texts From Last Night

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  (386): View more from Florida

  That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.

  (954): View more from Florida

  Apparently hers is a theme park.

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  (386): That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground. (954): Apparently hers is a theme park. http://tfl.nu/yoy4
  Replies (8) Good night (1055) Bad night (2059)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  "Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Haha how much did you smoke

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  4 feet of smokeee!

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  (570): "Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another? (609): Haha how much did you smoke (570): 4 feet of smokeee! http://tfl.nu/eyp0
  Replies (20) Good night (3564) Bad night (676)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house

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  (732): so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house http://tfl.nu/3ust
  Replies (18) Good night (652) Bad night (3937)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game

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  (626): Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game http://tfl.nu/ygf5
  Replies (38) Good night (4693) Bad night (1555)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.

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  (303): Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent. http://tfl.nu/g68o
  Replies (7) Good night (1542) Bad night (3832)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take

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  (303): If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take http://tfl.nu/wz90
  Replies (23) Good night (1222) Bad night (4908)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them

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  (307): If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them http://tfl.nu/vjhk
  Replies (13) Good night (4565) Bad night (755)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.

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  (480): Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed. http://tfl.nu/mw5c
  Replies (2) Good night (881) Bad night (1808)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.

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  (631): After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment. http://tfl.nu/pq89
  Replies (19) Good night (1068) Bad night (2840)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?

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  (318): Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it? http://tfl.nu/nm01
  Replies (2) Good night (2370) Bad night (969)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him

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  (202): when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him http://tfl.nu/8eei
  Replies (7) Good night (2309) Bad night (858)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.

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  (724): I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for. http://tfl.nu/9lin
  Replies (4) Good night (1804) Bad night (657)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?

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  (703): yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'? http://tfl.nu/6ned
  Replies (7) Good night (1597) Bad night (454)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?

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  (206): How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!? http://tfl.nu/pijo
  Replies (4) Good night (700) Bad night (396)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.

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  (705): His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband. http://tfl.nu/yqll
  Replies (3) Good night (588) Bad night (389)

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