If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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