So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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