I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Randomize
