yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
