It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I would ride that face into the sunset
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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