Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
