It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize