margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
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THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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