i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
