Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
We are two peas in an std pod
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
