Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
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