: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
