is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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