I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
