we have officially lost it.
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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