I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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